As therapists say, “if you focus on the wound you will feel hurt forever, however if you focus on the learning you will accept the growth”, so I decided to share all my decisive 2017 moments, no matter what:
1. Going on my own to tour Germany and the Netherlands by bus. Seriously, what was I thinking? Yes, I did it and I’ll do it again.
2. Accepting a marriage proposal only to break the engagement off one month later because I could not envision a life with the person I was turning myself into. *ALMOST*
3. Being sick. Not just a flu, or a common cold, but a REAL disease. I had to take 5 different meds every single day, including antibiotics, antiinflamatories and analgesics. No, I am not a masochist – the point here is as I was sick, I had to take care of myself and focus on the healing. Did I mention I was left alone on the house while my mother was doing a treatment against cancer? (of which she fully recovered and is healthy as ever).
4. Discovering the truth about Narcissists and Empaths. If you are not familiar to those definitions, please chech Psychology Today and HG Tudor’s blog.
5. Finally being able to meet in person three of my dearest European friends: Elena, Elisabeth and Joeri. It was awesome, friends, thank you so much!
6. Deciding to get out of the closet as Asexual: Yes, I will not have sex and you should mind your own business.
7. Being able to understand there is an absurd amount of narcissists everywhere and they all regard us as prey. We cannot control them so we have to spot them as quickly as possible and ru run run run awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
I almost abandoned this relatively short novel for lack of interest in its characters. Specially Clementine, a fairly narcissistic person whose only concerns are her own (mediocre) achievements, feelings and needs, disregarding her passive agressive co-dependent husband Sam and spoiled daughters Holly and Ruby, whose entitled and moody behaviour mirrors their mother. On the other hand, the couple of typical children of narcissists (acon) Erika and Oliver have both granted great achievements but one particular “failure” upsets them – they cannot conceive a child. Their neighbours Vid and Tiffany are the coolest folks around, while their daughter Dakota is the very image of conscience and introspection, untill one day she is burdened by a guilty that seems directed to everyone other than the real responsable (who else, Clementine). To top the human fauna scenery, a cranky neighbour who has a golden heart is the main hero of this narrative in which people are so busy trying to fix their internal messes of guilty and dirty little secrets it’s no wonder they leave children unattended subject to domestic accidents. A very entertaining novel, however, I would have enjoyed it more if Clementine had come to realise how faulty her perception of herself and the world around her was, rather than being granted an undeserved happy ending.